My Terms

I was just rereading my profile - I had to change my age, ugh! - and it said 'on my terms'. Which got me to thinking, what are my terms? That phrase is often bantered about, but when asked exactly what our terms are, many of us just get a blank look on their face.

So today I am going to think about what my terms are.

To do that I think we have to look at our priorities. My first priorities are my children and grandchildren. And now my second, but still very, very close to the first priority is myself. It has been a very long time since I've cared basically only for me.

My terms are 1) no one will tell me what is good for me, I will figure that out for myself, 2) I will give myself nice things and feel I deserve them, 3) I will give of myself to others, only to the degree I want to, 4) my physical and mental health is now an important issue, not because I'm sick, but because I don't want to get sick.

In writing those down and putting them out there in the universe for all to see, I feel, even more, the strength of my convictions. I am an important person, and if I am the only one to take care of me I'm going to do a darn good job of it. Wouldn't it be nice to have someone take care of me, yes it would. But it shouldn't be the only way I get taken care of. No one knows me better than me, so know one can care for me the way I can. And - here is an important point - I deserve it, I deserve the very best I can get. We all do.

Don't let someone take so much from you that there is nothing left. Even it is starts with 15 minutes locked in the bathroom with a good book, take it you deserve it. If you see a pretty scarf and it's in your budget, buy it, get the kids or husband/boyfriend/girlfriend something the next time. Treat yourself to something that you enjoy, a simple, quiet walk in the park, take yourself to lunch, soak in a bubble bath. It doesn't have to be a big extravagant affair, but if it can be - go for it!

Each of us, as individuals, need to realize what our terms are and get those terms fulfilled the way YOU need them to be.